First of all, I'm going to apologize now cause I have a feeling I may end up talking in circles! Not because I want to but because I want to be careful about what I say and the names I use. Maybe one day I'll be able to explain but for now, I'm going to be a little more evasive than I usually like to be.
It's been a trying few weeks. Not in everything but in some things. There was an incident a few weeks ago where I along with several others were disrespected over something that really was silly. Nothing was done on purpose by us...or even done at all by us. When we tried to explain the situation, it didn't seem to matter. The disrespect was just got worst. I'm a big girl. If you want to yell at me, I can live with that. And I'm not bothered by most things people say to me. If that's how you feel about me, so be it-especially when I've done nothing to make you feel that way. But here was someone who took a situation, and used it!!! Used it to ultimately make himself look like a jerk. But of course, he/she only looks like that to us. At least for the moment.
This was someone who has disrespected people for years. This isn't something new. People have just let it go...saying that this is how he/she is. Well, that line was crossed a few weeks ago. And we felt like something needed to be done about it. A few weeks later, we're still at this spot where no one really seems to want to make sure something is done. I shouldn't still be talking about this weeks later. But I am. And it's frustrating.
During a conversation I had this week, I got a few of several sides of the situation. And it made me think...AND PRAY. Pray that what I was doing was right. During this conversation, the word hypocrit came up and whether we should feel that way about the situation. And that hit hard. This person was NOT telling me we were hypocrites, just wondering if we were. So I thought about it. Are we? And after a lot of thinking and praying, I don't believe I am being one. Everything that has come out of my mouth about this person is truth. And I'd be just as willing to say it to this person-given the opportunity. And I'm really over why the whole thing started. Like I said, it was silly. It's the threats and disrespect I believe that need to be punished. I know if I had done that someone else, I'd be punished for sure.
Am I angry? I don't think so. I was at the beginning. And I may be after tomorrow assuming we still don't get answers. But for now, I just want something done. I can't be angry really. Not who I am to be honest. Plus, I've learned a lot about myself through this process and how I handle things. I've also learned things about others and how I few others. Even though the situation stinks, I've learned a lot. Suppose I can't argue with that too much.
It's not my place to judge. That's God's job. And I know that even if nothing else happens in this situation, ultimately it will have to be answered for. But is it wrong to want this person to answer to the rest of us while we're here on earth? Is that so wrong? If I am wrong, if God has something else He'd like to show me, have me to do, then I want to know! I just feel like at this moment I'm doing the right thing and I'm doing it the right way. Does that make sense?
It's been a trying few weeks. Not in everything but in some things. There was an incident a few weeks ago where I along with several others were disrespected over something that really was silly. Nothing was done on purpose by us...or even done at all by us. When we tried to explain the situation, it didn't seem to matter. The disrespect was just got worst. I'm a big girl. If you want to yell at me, I can live with that. And I'm not bothered by most things people say to me. If that's how you feel about me, so be it-especially when I've done nothing to make you feel that way. But here was someone who took a situation, and used it!!! Used it to ultimately make himself look like a jerk. But of course, he/she only looks like that to us. At least for the moment.
This was someone who has disrespected people for years. This isn't something new. People have just let it go...saying that this is how he/she is. Well, that line was crossed a few weeks ago. And we felt like something needed to be done about it. A few weeks later, we're still at this spot where no one really seems to want to make sure something is done. I shouldn't still be talking about this weeks later. But I am. And it's frustrating.
During a conversation I had this week, I got a few of several sides of the situation. And it made me think...AND PRAY. Pray that what I was doing was right. During this conversation, the word hypocrit came up and whether we should feel that way about the situation. And that hit hard. This person was NOT telling me we were hypocrites, just wondering if we were. So I thought about it. Are we? And after a lot of thinking and praying, I don't believe I am being one. Everything that has come out of my mouth about this person is truth. And I'd be just as willing to say it to this person-given the opportunity. And I'm really over why the whole thing started. Like I said, it was silly. It's the threats and disrespect I believe that need to be punished. I know if I had done that someone else, I'd be punished for sure.
Am I angry? I don't think so. I was at the beginning. And I may be after tomorrow assuming we still don't get answers. But for now, I just want something done. I can't be angry really. Not who I am to be honest. Plus, I've learned a lot about myself through this process and how I handle things. I've also learned things about others and how I few others. Even though the situation stinks, I've learned a lot. Suppose I can't argue with that too much.
It's not my place to judge. That's God's job. And I know that even if nothing else happens in this situation, ultimately it will have to be answered for. But is it wrong to want this person to answer to the rest of us while we're here on earth? Is that so wrong? If I am wrong, if God has something else He'd like to show me, have me to do, then I want to know! I just feel like at this moment I'm doing the right thing and I'm doing it the right way. Does that make sense?
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