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Faith

**This was my devotion...from last weekend I do believe...and I wanted to share it with you guys!**

Seeing the Unseen
Hebrews 11:23, Exodus 2:1-10, 6:1-7:6

"So sorry you can't stay longer," Jochebed sait to her friend and stood pointedly by the door. The warmth of the afternoon sun streamed onto their timeworn faces.

A neighbor had dropped by for the afternoon. Jochebed liked her well enough, and she enjoyed the welcome break during the day's routine. But Jochebed carried a secret no one outside of her immediate family could know. And if the woman stayed much longer late in the day like this, her mystery would be found out.

Jochebed had been privy to many secrets herself over the years - things most anyone keeps secret: a friend's envy, a neighbor's indiscretion. However, those secrets were nothing like this; nothing like a matter of life and death. And so it was well worth it to appear rude to her neighbor, to be a little more reclusive than she'd been before, to find creative ways to time her trips to the market.

What she did, she did in faith. Simple faith.

Faith: the hope that what she was doing was for the right reason, at the right time. That God had bestowed her with a sense of timing that was beyond human reasoning. Faith: The knowledge that there was no guarantee for the future, but there was grace for the day. Each evening gave her strength to continue her mission the next day. Faith: A tiny seed that she nurtured faithfully; a seed that grew delicate tendrils of courage to keep going despite the risks. Faith: The assurance that the God-given hunch, the slightest suspicion and the dream burrowed deep within the heart are not one's own doing, but the very evidence of God at work.
Jochebed pondered these thoughts and watched her neighbor amble down the street. Just then, her little secret awake from his nap.

**I think...at least for me...that living by faith is a constant thing...something I have to constantly work on. And I feel like the last few weeks (if not months) has been just that. And I'm almost questioning whether it's God or my own desires. I've made a few decisions lately that are completely based on faith alone because I'm pretty sure I can't do it without Him! But there's no doubt in my mind that I made the decisions God would have of me. Will the be easy? NO! And you never know...it may not even work out in the end...or at least not feel like it works out. It may end up being something that's full of a little more pain that I really want but I believe that God is in control of this and there's a lesson to be learned either way. But there's something else (well, a few somethings) that I've been pondering now for quite awhile...and just a few days ago, I'm almost positive it was ME that was screaming to do it as opposed to God. But now that things have settled (for the time being) and I've had more time to think, I'm not sure. I know what I want. And I know what my desires are. And sometimes it's hard to separate that from what God wants because we THINK we hear Him and it's really just us.

I think I mentioned a few months ago that I felt changes coming along. And I needed them. I felt stuck. And I'll be honest, some of those changes have come and man, do they make me nervous! (Kind of what I was just talking about...may be more painful than I want but still a great experience eventually!) And here's this situation, where I still feel a little stuck. I want answers. I'm struggling with the whole faith thing. I want to say, "OK, God. If I stay here, what happens down the road? Or if I move from this spot, then what happens?"

And in a way, it's just not the issue of faith, it's the issue of failure. It doesn't creep up for me often but when it does, it's a struggle for me!! And so that's where I am. That slight fear of failure just adds to my struggle to find the faith I need to take a step forward...whether that means staying put or moving on.**

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